It’s taken me a while to post this, but I feel this is a subject that never really gets much air time – as in the other side of the ‘skinny’…so here goes…
Picture the scene: it’s lunchtime so you decide to head into the office lunch room and you spy a colleague chowing down on an oversized slice of pizza, a chocolate muffin and a can of coke. Would you ever go up to that colleague and with a certain “snoot” in your voice state “Oh I would’t eat that if I were you, you’ve obviously put on a few pounds lately and that lunch choice you’ve made will only make it worse”…umm…No. I thought not. You wouldn’t dare would you? Can you imagine the response you’d get? Especially if said colleague was a female and heaven forbid, a little more on the ‘rotund’ side of things.
Well, welcome to my world. I have had these sorts of comments my entire working life. Only in reverse. For some reason people seem to be so interested in what I’m eating for lunch and I have absolutely no idea why. The snide comments often come thick and fast. That’s why I have devoted this article to ‘Speaking up for the Skinny’ because I am totally fed up of being derided by other females for being slim (or ‘so skinny’ as am often called). Well I’m not, I am simply fit and healthy.
I think perhaps it’s because (again, heaven forbid), I choose to eat differently from them. Note my word choices here ‘eat differently’ as I think the word ‘healthy’ is somewhat overused these days. In fact ‘eating healthily’ to me doesn’t mean a jot, as I eat ‘this way’ all the time. It’s not even an issue. Always have done and always will do. My mother was an amazing cook and perpetually whipped up the best food for us growing up. Nothing was processed and this is what my sister and I were used to. Our dear mother taught us well, not only about natural, wholesome food, but how to prepare and cook it well too – thanks Mother dearest!
So back to the office lunch room. It drives me absolutely nuts that almost every time people see what I have brought in for my lunch (or what I order if we are out for lunch) there is a panoply of snide comments ranging from “Oh you’re always so healthy” and “I can’t believe you always eat like that” to “Oh you’re ordering a salad”. These comments are honestly utterly bonkers. Now I’m not at all against people asking me questions about new recipes – of course not, am more than happy to do this, but it’s the rude and snooty comments that are often hurled my way for no reason whatsoever. And I hate to be sexist here, but yes, you’ve guessed, most of these comments come from females. The way I see it life is all about choices. You choose what you wear every day, you have chosen your career path (in one way or another), you choose who your friends are, you chose your other half, you choose to go for a run or you choose to eat that slice of pizza. It’s YOUR choice and yours only, and quite frankly your choices are no one else’s business, especially when it comes to what you put into your mouth.
Look, we all know the science, you put crap into your body, you will get crap out. It’s not difficult folks. You want to get fitter or leaner? Make better choices with you food and your daily activities. I want to shout out loud sometimes “YES IT REALLY IS THAT SIMPLE”. Why should what I do and eat or not do and eat affect you anyway? A dear girlfriend of mine also suffers from this ‘skinny discrimination’ or ‘thin-crimination’ as I have coined it. She told me a story the other day about how her female colleague said “Ugh! It so annoys me how you bring your homemade healthy lunch to work every day, and ugh! I can’t believe you go the gym each morning at like 6:00am”. This to me is utter madness. How can these things annoy such women? One word. Jealously. It must be! Why else would such negative comments be bandied around? Again though, it comes back to CHOICES. These women have the CHOICE to fill their faces from the breakfast buffet muffin tray at the 8:00am meeting. They have the CHOICE to hoover up the crackers and sweet treat leftovers in the lunch room at 3:00pm in the afternoon. I distinctly remember three occasions whereby I was once again in the firing line. One: I was ‘ordered’ to eat a cupcake, with the comment “Oh I want to see you eat a cupcake, you need to put on some weight anyway”. Two: “You’re not allowed to use the office gym as you don’t need it.” And three (I saved the best for last): “You skinny bitches” – yes, short and sweet, a nice touch that last comment isn’t it? It came at full pelt, out of nowhere, like a dry slap – torpedoed with venom at myself and another so-called ‘skinny’ colleague.
Can you imagine if the roles were reversed? If we did actually ‘Speak up for the Skinny?’. Let’s try a few shall we:
“Well, I don’t think you need another cupcake do you? I think you’ve had quite enough judging the size of your lard arse behind.”
“Ugh why do you always eat such processed crap? Is that why you are always ‘exhausted’ and in such a foul mood?”
“Ohhhh so you’re ordering the extra large bacon double cheese burger for lunch I see, well, you might as well glue it to your gut.”
You would have an utter MUTINY on your hands if you dared to say anything like this. Yet us so-called ‘skinny minnies’ – sorry make that ‘skinny bitches’ – are subjected to such comments all the time about what we are eating, why we are eating and why we shouldn’t eat ‘that’ but should eat something else instead. Who gave these negative nellies permission to speak to us like this anyway? What the heck does it have to do with them anyway?
I just do not understand why all this thin-crimination goes on. Just last week, the winner of the Biggest Loser was subjected to a huge amount of backlash because apparently she had lost too much weight. WHAT? I am totally bemused. Isn’t the point of the show to get fit and healthy? Yet this didn’t stop the Twittersphere and other media outlets lashing out with all sorts of ridiculous malicious comments about the winner. I thought we were meant to embrace body image, it’s something that many brands, celebrities and fashion icons have advocated for years. The Dove campaign from the early 2000s is a great example of how ‘normal’ women were used in their adverts. Women are taught to ’embrace their curves’, which is all fine and dandy, but what about slimmer girls? Can’t we too celebrate our bodies without being told we are too skinny or have an eating disorder? That’s another thing that riles me, why is it people bandy that term around too, I’ve heard it being mentioned numerous times if ‘said female’ decides to go on a health kick. Eating disorders are a serious disease and just because a person wants to change up their routine by making different food choices and being more active, does not mean they are suddenly anorexic. It is ridiculous and it is just beyond me.
Such comments though don’t just happen at work, oh no. Even in social situations they can be rife. Again, I just simply do not understand why people are so interested in what I eat? Another element I haven’t mentioned is that I suffer from irritable bowel syndrome (IBS). I have had to deal with it for about eight years now, so am pretty well versed in knowing what I can and can’t eat. IBS is an inflammation of the bowel and can be triggered by certain foods, especially gluten. I have got a lot better about telling people upfront about this, thanks to my husband telling me I need to do so. But even then, the comments still come thick and fast “Oh you’re not going to eat that?” – err no, I’m not. And before you make your absurd accusations about calories (I have NEVER counted calories in my life) it’s because if I eat that I will have stomach cramps and will be sat on the loo for the rest of the night. I find that being direct, blunt and anything mentioning “sitting on the loo” tends to work wonders. The other gem I often hear is “Oh yes IBS, I have that too”. It seems to be such a ‘trend’ for women to have stomach issues these days. If it’s valid, that’s absolutely fair, you wouldn’t want to wish IBS, or Crohns or ulcerative colitis on anyone. But I have been particularly flummoxed as have seen with my eyes so-called ‘sufferers’ eating all the foods that I know for a fact you can’t eat when you have IBS. But they tell me “Oh you’re so good”. It’s not even a question of being ‘good’, it’s a simple fact – if I eat that, I will be ill. And believe me, after eight years, I pretty much know these things. I have no idea where such strange comments come from.
Once again, I see that it is ‘women deriding women‘, whether is it from somewhat underhand comments in social situations or in a far more blatant way in the office. I feel that in far too many situations regular, healthy women get slapped in the face with all this ‘thin-crimination’. This is why I say we should “Speak up for the Skinny” be proud and content with ourselves and how we look. Therefore ladies we should say: “I don’t understand why my delicious meal irritates you” or “Why should my work outs or my daily hot yoga sessions annoy you? I don’t comment on your activities”. We should be able to say these things and NOT feel bad about it. We CHOOSE to live the way we live, and that’s why we not only look good but feel great too. That’s the most important thing. And again, I leave you with this: We all have CHOICES to make every day. So next time, focus on your choices and your life, before saying something negative to someone, just because they happen to be thinner than you. Honestly love, what other people are eating really shouldn’t be an issue, there are far more serious things in this world to get worked up about.
Until next time…
Live, love and laugh lots, Mrs T.
Mrs Thomas Talks 